List style. Blam! Go.
Top Moments in [Roughly] Chronological Order (because why should I have to further organize my notes?)
Jodie Foster gamely thumbs-upped Ricky Gervais’s Beaver commentary at the opening monologue (and also her children look exactly like her).
- Ricky Gervais to Johnny Depp, after introducing him, says he has one question for Johnny… Are you ready? “Have you seen The Tourist yet?” “Ahh, no… Oh boy, he’s fun,” as Ricky walks off stage.
- Christopher Plummer. Period. I still get excited about Christopher Plummer on merit of my intense love for The Sound of Music, but I swear, I am going to see The Beginners. I promise.
- Kelsey Grammer could not possibly have been more blasé about his win for Boss: “Ah, well, this is very nice.” Yes, Kelsey, generally, one would say it is rather nice. Some people even choke up a bit (I mean, true, let’s not be over-indulgent), but… yes, it is very nice for you. Also, yes, announcer, we all remember Frasier. For the record we also remember and miss Seinfeld and Friends, back when NBC was “Must See” and not just the sad third-rated network… or whatever it is these days. Maybe it no longer even has a ranking (I cry bitter tear for you, NBC).
Tina Fey’s photo bomb on Amy Poehler’s nominee shot. #golden
- Ludovic Bource’s acceptance speech for Best Score (The Artist) opened with the hilarious apology: “I’m sorry I’m French,” and continued on to the admittance that if his acceptance was a piece of music/dance, “It would be a tap dance.” There should always be more tap dancing in life. Always.
- Ricky Gervais introduced George Clooney as the “Cloonmeister General.” Clooney accepted the accolade with grace.
- Felicity Huffman and William H.Macy sang their bit of presenter banter, and it was actually pretty magical.
The answer to your query as to whether or not Nicole Kidman could actually breathe even once whilst teetering in her gown is: No, no she could not breath. I assume she cut herself out of the columnar gown ASAP and put on a nice sensible muumuu post-haste.
- Helen Mirren brought some humor to the Sidney Poitier presentation Morgan Freeman’s shiny new Cecil B. DeMille award. I just wanted Freeman and Poitier to hug it out.
- I love a man in tails. When Robert Downey Jr. came out to present in a full white tie and tailed tux (which he flipped out as he settled in front of the microphone), someone in the audience simply could not hold it together and shouted, “Yeah!” Agreed.
- The only time at which Leonardo DiCaprio abandoned his expression of utter confusion (aside from the look of exquisite non-amused-ness when he did not win in his category… again), was the smile that broke when Martin Scorsese won Best Director for Hugo.
- I wish the sound has not cut out when Ricky Gervais introduced Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek.
- The second apology for being French came from Jean Dujardin of The Artist as he accepted the Globe for Best Actor in a Comedy/Musical: “I’m French too… It’s not my fault my eyebrows are independent.” And then he mimed his joy—which was kind of magical. Make sure you catch his dancing as the camera pans away from the stage.
- Colin Firth’s well-done swing back at Ricky as a form of Hollywood penance.
- Here’s a scenario: Meryl Streep wins yet another Golden Globe, managed to act surprised, bustles her way up to the stage, realizes that she’s forgotten her glasses and will have to actually remember her prepared comments rather than read them. In a team effort moment, her reading glasses get passed up from her table to the front of the stage, where George Clooney hand them to David Fincher, who absolutely cannot get his shit together and hand Meryl Streep her flipping reading glasses. Fincher proceeds to sit there as she attempts to remember the other nominees’ names (someone shouts out “Rooney”), whilst George Clooney thinks to himself, “Why on GOD’S SWEET EARTH, did I not just walk the extra three steps and hand Meryl the glasses myself, Fincher is such a tool.” Meanwhile the rest of us wonder if Meryl Streep is leaving the Golden Globes up one trophy but down one pair of reading glasses. Fincher stole them.
And in adorable moments of the night, we have the famous dog from The Artist who not only attended the Golden Globes (they really need to fill seats), but got to scamper up on stage as part of the accepting party when The Artist won Best Comedy/Musical. Thoughts after the win: “I am the famous Artist dog, Uggie, where is my treat? I’m adorable, but that doesn’t mean I am any less famished than any other dog at any given time.”